What Is Life Coaching?

Life coaching is a relationship between a coach and a client that strives to help the client identify and set goals for themself and then find the steps that work best to achieve them. Life coaching is client centered and client driven, meaning the coach does not give the client “answers” but instead helps the client discover the path that works best for their life and situation. A life coach can help a client dig down deep and find what their true goals are and the driving force behind making those goals part of the client’s reality. A life coach is there to help set the steps in motion to make meaningful change in a client’s life and help hold the client accountable so that they can obtain their goals.

An important thing to note is that life coaching is NOT a substitute for therapy, and life coaches are NOT licensed therapists. If while working with a client it is found that the client needs more help than a coach can provide, the coach may refer the client to a therapist so that the client receives the best help possible. A life coach cannot help diagnose or treat mental health conditions. 

How Does Life Coaching With This Mom Matters Work?

Here at This Mom Matters, coaching includes a weekly zoom meeting with a client that helps to determine that mom’s goals for her personal life. My focus is to help moms reclaim a piece of themselves that they feel has been left behind. I say that because I truly feel that what moms feel they have “lost” has not really been lost at all. It has merely been set aside, ready to be picked back up whenever you are ready to accept it back into your life after becoming a mom. This can look different for each mom. Some people are ready to get back to themselves soon after their baby is born, some wait until their kids are old enough to go to school, and some wait even longer than that. Some of the waiting may be due to the fact that moms aren’t sure how to get that part of themselves back. They may feel stuck and unsure of where or how to start finding the pieces they set aside. That is where life coaching can help!

In each weekly session I discuss all types of things with clients. We do some activities and prompts to discover what is missing and to discover which path the client would like to follow to make their goals a reality. At the end of each meeting we set goals for the next week that are attainable and realistic so that steps can be made towards making the changes the client wants to make. I may assign a simple activity/worksheet to help solidify the goals that were set by the client. At the next week’s meeting we discuss the progress made and the worksheet that was completed. We then repeat the process for as long as the client needs to feel like they have obtained the goals they have set and feel confident that they can continue on their new path without support. My biggest role is to be an advocate for you and your goals as well as a support to help you feel validated and held accountable so that you can make the changes you are wanting to make in your life. 

The Benefits for Moms

Life coaching can be beneficial to many different people, but I have decided to help moms for a very specific reason. I feel that moms do a lot for their family and set aside their own goals and needs to make sure their family is taken care of. I want to be an advocate for moms not setting themselves to the side, but holding their needs and goals in the same regard that they hold the needs and goals of their family members. Moms should not feel left behind or as if what they want for themselves is not valuable. Having your own goals, separate from those of your family, as your own person, is important and necessary. Working with a life coach can help you discover the goals you want to set and find a way to fit them in your life without feeling like you’re letting down your other responsibilities to your family. It’s not about making yourself first all of a sudden, it’s about helping you find the pieces of yourself you feel are missing, and to show you that you matter.

Areas That This Mom Matters Can Help With

You may be feeling like you want to make a change, but you can’t put your finger on what exactly you’d like to do differently. That is perhaps the biggest thing that life coaching can help with. In our sessions each week, we can sort through different ideas and feelings to see what goals they lead to. Here is a list of some basic jumping off points that may help to spur an idea about what you’d like to work on:

• Finding time in your day to work towards a goal for yourself
• Determining what is important for your own personal growth
• Organizing your day so that you can make time for yourself
• Discovering your priorities for your personal/individual life
• Helping you to overcome obstacles that may arise while working towards the goals you set
• Finding enjoyable ways to fill your free time with more than just scrolling on social media
• Helping you find hobbies that might aid in you feeling more fulfilled as your own person
• Defining what it means to be a mom that fits you and your family best, instead of being stuck in someone else’s idea about what being a mom “should” look like
• Supporting you as you define, set, and hold boundaries related to maintaining the personal goals you set.

The list of what life coaching can help with is never ending. Every client is unique and brings different needs to their sessions. My goal is always to guide you in a supportive environment that is free of judgement and shaming. I know that just because something worked for me or another client, it doesn’t mean it will work for others. It is not my job to tell you how to move forward, but instead to help you find your own path. 

Taking the Leap

I realize that the group that I am talking to may feel hesitant, resistant, or guilty about reaching out to work with me. Moms are often selfless, putting themselves last. However, I feel that is why you should reach out about working with a life coach, especially if any of what I’ve said sounds interesting or something that you can relate to. I don’t have all of the answers, and I don’t have a pre-made game plan that I think everyone should follow. I strive to work with individuals and find new solutions for each mom that comes to me for support. Every mom deserves the one-on-one care for themselves that they so selflessly give to their children each day. 

Finding fulfillment for yourself does not take away from all of the wonderful things you do as a mother! You will still have time and love to give to your children, but you will also have love and time to give to yourself. It is true that you cannot pour from an empty cup. I wonder how many moms have been pouring from empty cups for far too long? I know that I poured from any empty cup for years before I realized how much I needed something for myself. Making a change for yourself doesn’t need to involve giant leaps and an exorbitant amount of time. The changes can be small and still be meaningful.

If something has felt off-balance in your day to day life and you feel stuck, or you feel like every part of you has been given away to others and you don’t have much left for yourself, I encourage you to set up a free discovery call with me. In our chat we can discover what is making you feel stuck and talk about what type of goal would be the most helpful for you. There is no commitment past the first free call if you don’t feel like it is a good fit. You never know what taking a chance will mean for you and your family. You may find that reclaiming a piece of yourself that has been set aside unlocks a new piece of your life that makes you feel more fulfilled as your own person, separate from being a mom. 

Reflection Questions:

Working with a life coach can unlock an entirely new way of being for moms that feel stuck, like some piece of themselves is missing. You are not lost, you have simply set a part of yourself aside and now may be the time to pick it back up again. Filling your own cup is not selfish, it is necessary and a great example for your kids to see that you matter too. As they grow older they will know that their needs are valuable too, because you have shown them through your actions.

I have created some reflection questions to help you think a little bit deeper about how you feel in your current stage of motherhood. After you have answered these questions thoughtfully and are interested in diving even deeper into how to make small changes that can help empower you by working with a life coach, please reach out through my website and we can work together to find what fits you in this season of life!

Reflection Questions:

1. What is something you set aside when you became a mom that you would like to reclaim?
2. Where do your personal goals/needs rank on your daily schedule? Are they often pushed aside, or do you make and hold firm boundaries around them?
3. Are you happy with the attention you give your needs each day/week?
4. How would making one small difference in your day change the way you feel about yourself as an individual, separate from yourself as a mom?
5. What is your catalyst for making a change just for you, and no one else?

However you are feeling about your motherhood journey is valid and differs from person to person. My goal is to help you find what works best for you and your family in this season of life. What works for one mom, might not resonate with another. If this blog resonated with you and you’d like to learn more about working with a coach, you can reach out through the contact form on my website. The first consultation call is always free, with no commitment unless you feel it is a good fit for you. If you’ve been wanting to make a change, maybe now is the time! Do what feels right for you!

*Coaching is not a substitute for therapy. This Mom Matters Coaching does not guarantee any results. I am not a licensed psychologist or healthcare professional. My services do not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals. This is a lifestyle blog and is not meant to be used as medical advice or to help to treat/diagnose any medical or mental health issues.